my
belief in 'Trust' is at an all time low... but not lost.
A bloke's July 2005 online journal
I'm
just going with the flow
any
red/green 'highlighted' words are links to deeper stuff
Friday
1st July
I am in my home, my garden, surrounded by stuff, my stuff, a paid up tenant,
while bodily discomfort continues... but I'd like to think I've got it's
measurement
and must use this chance to build a new vision, backed by my 'Who are
You' studies
in achieving my goal of remaining in this house
having got through the Divorce with dignity on all sides.
I
want to buy this house back but know that my illness now makes finding
future
employment impossible, while I remain poorly, procrastinating, shut down,
cut off
and networking empowerment feels good, mind control, doors of perception.
Saturday
2nd July
Uncomfortable but went to James St. Station in the evening to investigate,
exploring paranormal activity with the Cheshire
Paranormal Society,
but hid my hands in my pockets a lot.
Sunday
3rd July
Re-watched 'The Who' and 'Pink Floyd' Live 8 performances a fair few times
as I tried to focus on where my studies have brought me
and remain happy, after my sceptical analysis, that I'm on the right track.
Monday
4th July
Got a prescription for Dovobet
from my Doctor, which I haven't tried before, after
Sylvia phoned to let me know that she had been informed to expect her
cheque, this week,
and forced myself across to the Woody, again hands in pockets.
Tuesday
5th July
Pete F popped in, for his lost glasses case, and he kindly visited the
Post Office for me
before Ian M brought some wine around, in the evening, and we chatted
as I noticed how much better the hands looked.
Wednesday
6th July
Still only bad news on the doormat
but was impressed at how the new ointment has reacted
and was able to listen comfortably when Paranormal John popped in in the
evening.
Thursday
7th July
Made myself a coffee before opening the letter from my Solicitor
and was pleased to find my Marriage Redundancy cheque inside,
which was soon deposited in the Bank.
Called
into Asda and bought a bit of food, and treated myself
to a bottle of Highland
Park as a memento, before chatting on the phone
with my Son and Daughter, and both remain sceptical of my forthcoming
experiment,
but I'm sure that it will benefit both
before I went and had a pint, or two, in the Woody.
Friday
8th July
Relaxed, and was able to enjoy a phone call from Sylvia, after closure,
and am pleased at the reaction that my skin is enjoying from the Dovobet
but saddened at Paranormal John's distress from an ex-member.
Saturday
9th July
Attacked the pile of envelopes and opened toooo many
but was pleased that there was nothing frantic
before being picked up for a vigil at the old morgue,
where I enjoyed holding hands with two nice young ladies,
and meditated on good things to come.
Sunday
10th July
A lovely sunny day got me out in the garden, in shorts,
and I pottered around, relaxed among the blossoming beauty,
for much of the evening as well, before slumping in front of the TV, feeling
good.
Monday
11th July
Arran & Loz called in and ran me down to the bank, where I was able
to repay a debt
and then signed up to receive new impetus, via the Shared
Vision Network,
before
a good chat with my Bank, which will clear all debt to them and,
after Paranormal John popped in, I felt good as I dropped off the car
at the garage
and went across to to the Woody for my usual Monday pint
and then enjoyed chatting with Mark S through the night
and pondered on a favourite song, The
Future's So Bright I Gotta Wear Shades.
Tuesday
12th July
Despite the hot Summer day, I got the iron out and cleared the backlog
of shirts
while Simon, my nephew, did a bit of research for me, for a Media
Center PC,
before I relaxed in front of the rented TV for a bit of CSI\Law
& Order
Wednesday
13th July
Pottered around the house, with music playing again,
before gaining access to the first, of 21, Shared
Vision conference downloads
and conversed with Arran through the night on MSN Messenger.
Thursday
14th July
Kev called in and I enjoyed waffling on about what I thought the web offered,
as my Daughter Sarah phoned with doubts about her undoubted skills, before
my Nephew Simon called in to explore boys toys, and ran me down to a hole
in the wall
where I confirmed that Bank debt was cleared, and knew my real financial
base,
and my Son Michael kindly Messaged, just before I went across to the Woody
with a smile.
Friday
15th July
Brian popped in and kindly used his Credit card to order a home learning
course for me,
which I was able to pay him for, and he also brought a Digital SLR magazine,
which led me
to spend the rest of the day internet exploring the Olympus
E-300 and Nikon
D50.
Saturday
16h July
Woke early to alarms, but rose late to dreams, and fortunately Keith and
Trish were late
in picking me up for a days shopping in Chester, but I enjoyed their company
and bought the Olympus E-300 two lens system, from London
Camera Exchange
and bought Trish's old phone, an advance on my old Matrix, before meeting
Lee from work,
before a few pints, aware that so much walking had hurt my tender soles.
Went
back to Lee's house, as Sarah arrived from work, and then we all went
to their local
for food, and Badger Bell's band was playing Radar
Love on his 63rd Birthday,
as Sarah and I talked about the past and I celebrated the present.
Sunday
17h July
Woke to blisters and hangover, but eased in both mind and skin, and found
time to explore
the camera manual, before phoning Sarah to thank her for a lovely evening,
and then phoned Brian on my camera choice, while listening to my musical
'Moment', Leonard Cohen's
Dear
Heather CD, superb, and, after a limited understanding of the buttons,
was really impressed with the tentative tests shots, as I explored the
quality lenses.
Monday
18h July
Tested the 40-150mm lens more, on my friendly frog and feathered visitors,
before Tim called in and we became engrossed in what we would put in this
brick shell
if we were a developer, while I downloaded more Shared
Vision stuff
and enjoyed a 'fingers crossed' chat with Michael
as I re-read my '86 forecast of Digital TV.
A
long time friend, Tony M phoned, aware of our shared preference
of a wired home and I enjoyed viewing his recommendation of CEDIA,
just before
Sharon phoned to arrange a viewing of the house that Ray had bought,
and I'm looking forward to meeting them both tomorrow, when stuff will
be sorted,
before enjoying Ernie, David and Tony A's company, across at the Woody.
Tuesday
19h July
Ray and Sharon arrived, and she was as bubbly as my telephone calls had
led me to believe,
and I enjoyed sharing Style with them as well, before Arran popped in
as I was getting ready to meet Ernie, so was unable to comprehend his
latest idea.
|
Met
Ernie in the Woody and we enjoyed a nice steak together, to celebrate
his 74th Birthday, After
a lovely time with Ernie, I still needed |
 |
I've
lived through the 'Mod', 'Hippy' and 'Married' times, understanding quality
and want to come off State support, and while I've done some things that
I shouldn't have:
I smoke, I'm a Marlboro man,
I've done LSD a couple of times, as with Cocaine, but enjoyed Marijuana
more, and still enjoy the odd joint during a festive event, but I'm most
concerned
at how much I've abused alcohol through the past troubled times
which may have contributed to my skin disability, which is greatly eased
at the moment.
Wednesday
20th July
Brian phoned, with the good news that the PhotoReading course had arrived,
and my nephew, Simon, phoned to say that he had found a nice
32"
LCD, for me to test,
and was pleased when Paranormal John called in to tell me there was no
vigil on Saturday,
and then Brian kindly took the trouble to bring the well packed parcel,
containing a wealth of CDs, DVDs and information, I'm well impressed.
I
was good, and put the package aside, as we turned our eyes through the
Olympus lens
and, respecting his opinion, I was pleased to accept his congratulations,
and the home grown tomatoes, which added colour to my evening meal.
I
settled back and got myself focused, ready to go with the energy flow,
which I think
Paul R. Scheele's 'PhotoReading Whole Mind System' employs, with trust
that my moment
of having no baggage, free of debt, in amity with my Sylvia, no skeletons
in the cupboard
and in conjunction with some nice people, I re-opened the package and
read the booklet
before' donning headphones to the first, of 9, CD and had a grasp of where
we were going
as we got to the 'let's do a fun test' bit... when Paranormal John phoned
with a problem,
spell broken, so listened to the end but will start again tomorrow, with
telephones off,
so watched the 3 DVDs, and know that I will complete this course and be
a better man.
Thursday
21st July
Knew the clunk of mail was special as it hit the floor and it was the
Paraliminal CD
that I'd been expecting, and listened to the hypnotic 'Get around to it'
CD and, later,
the 'Memory Supercharger' CD in my training course, before I called into
the Ellesmere Service Centre, after my Mark 1 Golf (Y Reg.) passed it's
MOT again, as I want to give it to my Mum,
and get another car from them for me, if something interesting crosses
their path.
Went
into Ellesmere Port Town and sorted some stuff
and, perchance, met Peter F, who kindly saved me waiting for a return
bus ride
before wandering across to the Woody later, and it was nice chatting with
Ian B
before Scotty joined me and I enjoyed hearing of his jaunts around Anglesey
and look forward to taking my Olympus to a fascinatingly photogenic site
that he'd found.
Friday
22nd July
After a listening to the 'get off your backside' Paraliminal before bed,
I woke as normal
and waited, and then the Delivery arrived from Elf,
Oooooh, a Media Center PC,
a laptop for my Camera and an answer machine, before Paranormal John dropped
in,
as as Nick brought his old Computer
Plus works computer here, which I'd agreed to buy, sight unseen, last
night and handled my Old Computer with care, as the brattish games PC
took centre stage, but I'm writing these notes, on the old faithful, tucked
away in close proximity,
storing so many experiences, still in contact and sharing this screen.
Saturday
23rd July
Woken at midday by Terry, Sharon's electrician, who apologised for yesterday's
no-show,
and got involved with executing my MindMapping of last night, after Terry
left, and,
apart from Paranormal John letting me down, I got most things working
well
together.
Sunday
24th July
Nick popped in with his cute 10 month old child, I'm glad I'm through
all that, and
a spare 40 gig hard drive, and we chatted about stuff,
and he returned later with a nifty switch,
which allows me to run both my main PCs with one Monitor, keyboard and
mouse,
while my Mum and Simon were here to look at my car, which I've given to
Mum,
as she needs a reliable car and wouldn't know what to do with 5 gears.
Monday
25th July
I was really chuffed when Robin called in to say that our web experiment
was working,
as I listened to thoughts from the first Shared
Vision conference,
and was blown away when Nick brought my 19" Teko\Relisys TFT screen
in the evening
and Paranormal John brought my scanner disk back,
before a nice visit across to the Woody for a pint.
Tuesday
26th July
It seemed a good idea to replace the main PC's floppy drive, with a camera
card reader,
but while in there I ended up reconfiguring the hard drives and DVD players,
and the same thing happened when I replaced the floppy in my old PC,
but both were working well by the time I was finished,
and then I was ready to have a play with the new Media Center
until a heard the rattle, and found that the hard drive was hanging loose
inside,
wrong screws, and it was no surprise to find that the PC was broken.
Wednesday
27th July
Phoned Elf and spoke with Nick, as Karl wasn't in today, and had no problem
getting a replacement for tomorrow, and Simon phoned to say that the LCD
was in stock
and he brought it here in the evening, 2 minutes before Doug arrived with
his dodgy laptop,
and I let Simon play with the setting up, as I concentrated on sorting
the problem,
and took Doug's nearly sorted laptop across the road later, and was pleased
when Roger H,
one of my Weblog readers, suggested that we call into the Woody to see
what it was like,
so Doug, Peter F, Roger H and I went for a pint, where we were joined
by Tony A and Scotty.
Thursday
28th July
Doug popped in and we sorted out his laptop properly, as Sharon's plumber
arrived,
and then the replacement
Media
Center arrived, which worked fine, but
ordered a replacement DVI graphics card from Nick, which was promptly
delivered, and when conjoined with the TV,
it made a superb starter system (but needs a proper Digital aerial)
sufficient to go and have a nice pint across the road, and enjoyed chatting
with Barry.
Friday
29th July
Worked through last night on wiring up the room, and shifting furniture,
quietly,
and was pleased with how it was working when I woke in the morning, and
by the time
that I'd emphasised the need for Ad-Aware
and Spybot
to Dave W (944+ naughtiness)
and a lovely chat with Sarah, and Mark, I was prepared to cope with the
cleavage Mayhem with Tony A and Ian, in the Friday Woody, and maybe had
a pint too many.
Saturday
30th July
Feeling a bit weak in the morning but was pleased at how the room worked
and,
after a bit more tweaking, I was picked up by Sacha, a day after passing
her driving test,
as we made our way to Plas Teg for a vigil, but felt at ease with her
car control,
and I enjoyed testing the new camera against my trusted 6 year old digital
compact
and, as expected, there were far fewer 'Orbs' on the new SLR.
Sunday
31st July
Examined the previous nights photos in detail, and was surprised at the
different results
before my Mum and Simon came to pick up her new car, and DVD player,
and I was quite sad to see it being driven away,
as it has been a good car for me and trust that it will serve Mum well
in the future,
before switching off in front of the TV and relaxing through the evening.
